Poptarticus

Shannon’s Super Sexy Blog. Music. Travel. Randomness. And a Lot of Wine.

The Loneliness of the Long Distance Driver

Disgusting.
$130 for a ticket!
(On phone.) Tom. I got there right at 10:00 and all they had was seats in the back. And they were ONE HUNDRED THIRTY DOLLARS EACH. So I said fuck it.
(Hanging up.) If I was a U2 fan, like Tom, I would be on the ground crying because my band is not only putting out crappy records, but they are also screwing their fans.
Yep, no more ‘band of the people” I guess.
Poo-2. FuckYou2.
I remember when U2 used to play for FREE.
Those days are clearly gone.
I bet the Pope doesn’t even charge that much.
The Pope charges?
OK, well, not the Pope.
Celine Dion charges that much. Also Madonna.
Celine Dion doesn?t count. I wouldn’t pay $10 to see her, even if she had a real fire-breathing dragon on stage.
I’d probably pay $130 to see Frank Sinatra.
Frank Sinatra is dead.
EXACTLY.
Elvis! I’d pay that much to see Elvis.
Or the Beatles!
I’d pay that much to see Macca at the Red Square but only if they threw a plane ticket to Moscow in.
You are not British. Please stop talking like a British person.
I reckon it’s OK to talk like a British person, if you aren’t trying to fake an accent, like Madonna.
I wonder if when Madonna gets hammered, she lapses into a Cockney accent?
Blimey. What a thought.
STOP TALKING LIKE A BRITISH PERSON.
Let’s not forget you paid $500 to see Radiohead once.
Yeah, but that included gas and a hotel room in L.A.
Those were the early days of ebay, I don’t think they had the “Buy it Now” feature at that point.
Let’s not forget that it was that ticket that eventually lead to me living in Venice. I wouldn’t be the renowned authority on Venice bars if I hadn’t bought that ticket.
That $285 dollar ticket.
Radiohead didn’t charge that much, the holder of the ticket did.
Radiohead wouldn’t screw their fans like that.
We are treading in potentially boring material here.
Speaking of British people, I wonder if you can be Prime Minister if you are Irish?
Bono as Prime Minister. Maybe that’s why he shook George Bush’s hand!
He wants to be more than a pop star, that’s pretty clear.
In the words of Jeff Tweedy: “What you once were, isn?t what you want to be, anymore.”
Now he is just a world figure raping his fans with high ticket prices.
Yes. Let’s not get into “How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb.”
Complete and utter crap.
That has got to be the boringest record ever. Who are they trying to kid?
Don’t forget, most people are sheep.
You’d have to be a sheep to buy that piece of crap.
I think you are running the risk of pissing off a lot of sheep right now.
Good, they should take the piss if they bought that stupid, boring record.
Take the piss? You can’t stop talking like a British person, can you?
So I wonder how many piss-taking sheep are going to spend $500 on ebay to get one of those tickets?
Lots of forty-something clueless fucks will, you can be sure.
I think you are running the risk of pissing off a lot of forty-somethings right now.
Remember that Prince concert where all the people starting cheering because they thought the opening act was Prince?
Yes, I’d imagine the same crowd will be at the U2 concert.
Hey, I bet a lot of them will get laid for the first time in a long time, that night.
Hey, now that I think about it, I’d pay $130 if I could get a seat close enough to see Adam Clayton’s package.
Row 8?
That would probably do it.
You’d have to be like, in the pit to see Bono’s package!
I think you are running the risk of really pissing off Bono here.
Yeah, but not Adam Clayton, and he is the only U2 who matters.
Just because of his package?
Pretty much. A better meaning for “what a fucking dick.”
I use to really love “The Unforgettable Fire.”
Pretty much everything since has been Pretty Forgettable.
Na ah. What about that other record? The huge one? I used to listen to it all the time.
Joshua Tree.
Oh yeah. I think I traded that one in for a Pearl Jam record.
What about Zooropa?
Zooropa? Snoozeropa is more like it.
In the words of Johnny Rotten, “fucking boring, Sidney! Exterminate! Exterminate!”
That wasn’t Johnny Rotten, that was a movie about Sid Vicious.
Yeah, but it is fun to say that. If you are totally into talking like a British person, that is.
In the words of the Super Furry Animals: “move you, buy and sell you, terrorize you, mass destruct you.”
U2 ought to listen to “Phantom Power” so they can hear what a good pop record is suppose to be like.
“Flaunt you, disconnect you, cluster-fuck you, we will crush you.”
Well, I am not sure what it all means, but it sure sounds good.
All the sheep heard that tiny bit of the U2 record on that Ipod commercial and thought their record was good all the way through.
And only that tiny bit was OK. Even the rest of the song sucked!
Sellouts.
Yep, they can’t go around saying they aren’t sellouts anymore.
Um, anyone who shakes George Bush?s hand?
You’d shake it.
No I wouldn’t.
Yes you would.
No.
Yes.
Don’t you know it is impossible to win an argument with yourself?
Whatever.

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